Saturday, 22 April 2017

Money and Power

By the Darn-Poor Rhymer

Power and money, money and power,
Which is stronger, money or power?
Money can give you a lifetime of honey,
But power allows you to steal others’ money.

Thursday, 13 April 2017

On the incident on United flight 3411

By the Darn-Poor Rhymer
(A parody of John Betjeman’s “Slough”)

Come friendly skies, and tell us how
You fell on Doctor David Dao.
No more can you evade it now;
Tell us the truth.

Good Doctor Dao had bought his seat;
All his commitments he did meet.
Why did you not your part complete?
Tell us the truth.

And when he tried to have his say,
You only thought to have your way;
So, soon you called the TSA,
Lords of unruth.

The tyrants came and broke his nose;
And everyone who saw it froze.
But what they did, as YouTube shows,
Was uncouth.

And how should we respond to these,
That treat us as no more than peas,
Without a single “if you please?”
It’s plain as day.

Let’s smash their desks of polished oak,
Let’s smash their hands so used to stroke,
Let’s stop them forcing us under the yoke;
Let’s make them pay!

Come friendly skies, and tell us why
You didn’t let the Doctor fly.
Reality strikes hard and high;
You’re the uncouth.

Monday, 13 March 2017

On the Joys of Spring

By the Darn-Poor Rhymer

Sometimes it’s hot,
Sometimes it’s not.
But sun and showers
Bring out flowers.

Tuesday, 21 February 2017

No more taxes, no more wars

(After the school playground song “No more Latin, no more French”)

By the Darn-Poor Rhymer

In a few years, how will things be,
When England is an AGG*?
No more taxes, no more wars,
No more scheming behind closed doors.
No more lies or propaganda,
No more “justice” without candour.
No more politician prats,
No more bossy bureaucrats.
No more weasel words from moanies,
No more cushy jobs for cronies.
No more barriers in the way
Of those who want to earn good pay.
No more stealing of earned wealth,
Whether obvious or by stealth.
No more cameras all about,
Spying on us to catch us out.
No more tracking of our bytes,
No more trampling on our rights.
No more stops without good cause,
No more bad, politicized laws.
When England is an AGG,
Then all its people will be free.

* AGG = Area of Good Governance. An area in which the political state has been, or is being, replaced by governance which maintains peace, defends the rights of civilized people, justly resolves disputes, and does no more.

Saturday, 21 January 2017

Two Limericks about Donald Trump

The Trumpets have sounded! No doubt
That the ruling class called a time out.
A breath of fresh air
We can take, if we dare,
But it isn’t yet timely to shout.

I really don’t know about Trump.
Is he good? Is he bad? Can he jump?
But his foes are mine;
And he’ll do just fine,
If he lays them to rest in the dump.

Sunday, 4 December 2016


By the Darn-Poor Rhymer

The X, the Y, the U, the D,
They all flow down towards the C.

The A1 and the 7 greet,
As at a confluence they meet.

The River Eden is in 5;
There, Adam had 6 with his wife.

Old Father Thames we should not hate;
He turns a bend at Chiswick 8.

I’ve 1 more river. It’s the Ts,
And it goes nowhere near St. Bs.

Such talk is Irk-some? And 2ché?
Good 0 from the 4shore of the Wey.

Wednesday, 9 November 2016

What Hillary Clinton did after the election

By the Darn-Poor Rhymer

Hillary Elephant packed her trunk
And said goodbye to the caucus,
Off she slunk as the drums did thump,
Trump, Trump, Trump!